old reply to Tom for week 1

I guess it seems traditional that a man should open a door for a woman but nowadays I think it is more just about commmon courtesy than anything else. I guess I think this because I am a little younger so it is not as instilled in me as it is in those that were raised more traditionally. I can see how you feel a little weird if a woman opens the door for you at the workplace, but hey, just say thanks and go through it. It is not a big deal. When I get to a door if I am the first one there than I definitely hold it for whoeever is behind me, wheher it be a male or female. I notice that sometimes people walk through and don't even say thank you, which I think is kind of rude but maybe thats just me. Whenever anyone holds a door for me I always say thank you to them. I personally don't think that gender matter when it comes to door opening, it is just polite to open the door for others and shows good manners.

reply to Glenn final week

I think you have the right idea Glenn! It is time that we all take a stand and strive to change our society for a better future. We really can't bring up future children the same way that children decades ago were brought up because lets face it, the world is alot different now than it usd to be. I do not have any children yet, but I know that when I do I am going to bring my children up to be open minded and tolerant of others. I cannot stand when people are judgemental of others or racist, and yet they really cant tell you why. All they know is that thats the way it is in their family so they feel like its some type of obligation to have the same viewpoints as their family. It is time that this type of nonsense comes to an end. Instead of trying to shelter children from all types of differences in the world, we should start educating them at a young age so that they can make their own informed decicions instead of being dictated how they should react to certain things. Children are eventually going to see it all, so we might as well teach them the right way to be accepting than to try to hide them from the differences. I hope that many others have the same viewpoint as you do because that is the type of people that we need in order to change the world for the better.

business post final week

So to be honest, I ended up taking this class by accident. My advisor had me in some other class and the first day of it she realized it was for english majors only so she switched me into this class at the last second and called me and is like, "I hope you are interested in gender studies." Now, I honestly had no idea what to expect in this class, and really I have never taken any kind of gender course before. I was just hoping that this class wasn't boring, because the first thing that popped in my head was like us having to read some stuff from hundreds of years ago about how men and womens culture developed or something. That probably sounds stupid, but I just didn't know. Well now I can say that I was pleasantly surprised by this class and I am really glad my advisor stuck me in at the last second. The stuff we read was interesting and not only that, it was important. The class opened up everyone's eyes to real life issues and helped us to become aware of the stuggles we all face everyday in our sex and gender. I am glad to say that this class is one of the many few that we can actually apply to real life and help us become more understanding of each other and the world around us. I think it is kind of ironic because there are so many classes that are required to take to graduate, and most of them you don't really learn anything from. It feels like a waste of time but you have to do it if you want to graduate. I feel like this type of class should be required way more so than certain others, because this class actually teaches us about real life and about relationships in our future work environments and personal lives. I feel like everything we did was worth the time we took to do it. I think we all can now be more aware of gender issues that we face every day in our daily lives, and I am sure we all learned something that we can maybe change within ourselves to make us better people and better able to relate to others around us. Thank you all very much for the opportunities we have had to share and to listen to each other. Hope you all have a great summer. Thanks Prof M for this class!

reply to Alex final week

That is awesome that you felt so at home and connected to the issues we discussed in this class. I know what you mean when you say that it is hard to just socially talk about this kind of stuff like at a party or something social. Alot of people don't really realize many issues that we discussed, but atleast those of us that took the class are more informed now. I am glad it was such a good experience for you and its truly amazing that it made you feel more empowered as a woman, in the many aspects of your life. Good luck to you in the future!
p.s. You will be awesome in the PTA...your daughter is a lucky girl =)

business post week 6

Do you think that guys that have sisters treat women better? I was talking to my boyfriend's mom and she was telling me some stuff one of her son's did that upset her. It had to do with him bringing home a few different girls in the same week and how she was pissed off because she felt disrespected in more ways than one. First she thought it was rude that he did that in her home when he has his own apartment to do that type of thing in, and felt that he was disrespecting her as a woman by doing that in her house. Also, she does not like that he obviously does not think much of these girls if he is bringing various girls home in a short time period. We were talking in general about how guys treat girls in general, and i was thinking, do you think maybe he does not have as much respect or understanding of females because he has no sisters? As a general statement, I feel that most guys that I know that do have sisters are somewhat more respectful towards other females and also have a better clue of how their minds work and the way they perceive things. Maybe they see more into what bothers or upsets girls so since they have this experience they can use it when learning how to treat other women that come into their life. We were also saying that we think men that treat their wives respectfully and lovingly usually have sons that treat women just as well. I think that some males learn how to treat females from the way that their fathers do. This is also why if a father is abusive than it is likely that the son can end up being abusive as well. My boyfriend's father died when he was very young so him and his brothers did not have their father around to see how well he treated their mother when he was alive. She thinks this also has something to do with it because his brother did not have a positive male role model around where he could see how women should be treated by men. Girls, what do you think from your personal experiences? Guys..what do you think?

reply to John week 6

Ha don't you just want to smack the crap out of her sometimes? If you have more credentials for the job than bam, that makes you the boss. It doesn't matter that you are younger, but I do notice that older people have a hard time when people younger than them are in charge. They feel that because they are older that they don't have to listen to you because they think they know more. I am one of the youngest at my job and I get the same thing alot. People dont listen to what I have to say in staff meetings or if I tell them something that has to be done, they kinda brush me off like oh whatever. If you have to remind her once in awhile whose boss, than thats what ya gotta do. It doesn't make you rude at all, its her own fault for not respecting you.

reply to Glenn week 6

What the hell? I think that it is ridiculous to claim that two girls kissing in public is innapropriate and that they should be thrown out. I do not think it matters who it is that is kissing, whether it be a man and a woman, a man and a man, or a woman and a woman. Honestly, who gives a shit? If you dont agree with homosexuality than dont kiss members of the same sex thats all. It doesn't give people the right to claim that someone else's behavior is unacceptable just because they do not agree with it. My answer is, if you think its wrong than don't look. As far as explaining it to children, why not be honest? Your kids are eventually going to end up coming into some situation that involves homosexuality, so if they are prepared for it, its probably better. For all you know your kid is going to end up being gay, so people need to watch what they say. If people teach their children at a younger age that everyone is different and that doesn't make them bad people, than our society would become more accepting of each other even if we all don't have the same beliefs. I think that the definition of innapropriate in a public place is the same for everyone regardless of what sex's are involved. If you are really going too far in public like groping like crazy or clothes coming up or off, that is when it becomes a problem. If you wouldn't want your own kids to see strangers doing that, thats when you know it is too much.

reply to Prof M week 6

I have not seen many of rhese shows but my 2 year old nephew loves Diego and Dora. From what I have seen Dora is not your typical female. They have her doing all kinds of adventurous things like climbing and swinging from trees and not afraid to get herself dirty. I think this is good because it shows little girls that it is okay for them to do the same type of things as boys. They do not have to sit all clean and pretty in a dress and worry that they cannot do anything that might dirty them up. My niece is 1 and I think because my nephew watches these shows that she will too and she is going to end up learning from them that she can do the same things as her brother can even though she is a girl.

reply to Alex week 6

Oh my god! Youre a lifesaver..you should be very proud of yourself. You and your sister did a very brave and noble thing there and I hope you were recognized for it. Man i am hoping to god that the only reason that the guy didnt jump in after his kids was that he was literally frozen in shock and fear. That is the only reason why I can imagine that he didnt dive in after them, although that does not excuse his behavior. I am thinking that even when women are in shock and fear their first insincts are to protect their child so it is like more natural for them to automatically put themselves in danger to save someone, but really you would think that a man would have that instinct to protect the females in his life as well. I guess we will really never know for sure why he didnt automatically jump in after his daughters. I am curious to know why he didnt. Its kind of sad that he didnt. What would have happened if you and your sister didn't? I am sorry that you had such a trauma while celebrating father's day but you did a very good thing and I hope that that particular family was appreciative to you and your sis.

business post week 5

So this past weekend I was at a barbecue at one of my friends houses. It was mostly guys but there were maybe like 4 girls there. So everyone is swimming and hanging around outside. A little while later all the girls but one were inside putting together some food and the guys were outside grilling on the barbecue. They were done so they brought the food over to the patio to put it down and they were just sitting and waiting. The one girl that stayed outside was laying in a lounge chair right next to the table and chairs that the guys were sitting at. She apparently just started crying out of nowhere. Now keep in mind there is like 9 guys right there, so obviously someone is there to see what is wrong with her. Instead of one of them getting up to ask her what was wrong, one just gets up and walks to the sliding door to the inside and just yells, hey one of you come out here Steph is crying. So we are like what... what happened? And he is like, i dont know I didnt ask her, so one of you go outside and see whats wrong. We are like, what the hell? Theres all of you out there and none of you could get up and go talk to her..you had to come inside to get one of us. Now, what was even worse is that one of the guys that was there has a huge crush on this girl. Instead of being sweet and going and seeing what upset her, he completely ignored the fact that she was crying. I was thinking, smooth move idiot. You finally have a chance to go show her you care and instead you sit there like a moron and dont even acknowledge the fact that she is clearly upset. Way to pick up a girl! I know most of these guys pretty well, and on an individual basis every one of them would care that she was crying, but all of a sudden when they are all there combined they sat there and didnt do anything at all. I think it was because it was a social activity with alot of males and they felt like they had to be all tough and manly around each other. Maybe they felt like the situation was not the right place for them to show a softer sensitive side. I feel this might be the case because they immediately came straight to the females and insisted that it was a girl that had to deal with an emotional problem. Maybe they didn't consciously realize it..but they were gender stereotyping. Guys...what do you think? If you were there do you think you would have responded the same way?

reply to Dorit week 5

I completely see what you are saying and you have some very good points. I am thinking that maybe with the economy getting worse and worse and how the roles of women in the workplace have grown to be more important, that maybe cost of living has something to do with it. It is hard to pay for everything nowadays, especially to support children. Maybe women are realizing how much money it takes to raise a child and they wait till they are older because they want to be more established and financially ready to care for a child. It probably has to do with jobs as well. If a woman finds herself in a good paying job with a position she really likes, that it may keep her from taking time off and doing the whole child thing for a little while longer. It is difficult to be torn up between finally being important in the workplace but wanting to give in to your maternal instincts as well. I find just from observation that alot of women want to work for awhile and get some decent time in to be successful in a job, to save up money, and then they want to have children a little later in life. I do not think there is anything wrong with it unless the woman has some kind of health risks. I think it is better off for the family and the child to be better established within themselves as well as a financial aspect so that way there is less stress to deal with along the way. It is always better to be more over prepared than to be underprepared and take the risk of sinking!

reply to Prof M week 5

Well first of all..congratulations!! you have a beautiful little girl and she is lucky to have such an awesome mom as well. I think it is awesome that you adopted your daughter. While I know that some people feel it is probably a special experience to give birth to your own flesh and blood child and know that you created that baby, there are so many little children out there who need homes. Part of me feels like we should start caring for those that are already in this world and providing them with love and homes before bringing even more children into the world. Just because a child is adopted doesn't mean that its not your own child..if you love the child with all your heart than it may as well be your own flesh and blood. It does not matter if the color of your skin is the same or not..of ir you were both born in the same country..it is all about what is on the inside that counts. If you can provide for the child and meet their needs and love them than that is all that matters. Race, ethnicity, gender, sexual preference, religion....it doesnt matter. If you have love in your heart to share than that is all you need. I hope to adopt a child one day as well.

reply to Glenn week 5

Geez...that just made me sick. That is absolutely terrible but i believe what he said because it probably does happen. It is not the first time I have heard something like that and I just dont understand it. I agree with what you said..that they should just train the girls to be able to do the same jobs as the boys. Who says they literally cant do it? That isnt true, its more like just no one has attempted to let them try before coming to the conclusion that girls are useless. I don't really understand his reply to you about how its passed down through generations and they are really poverty stricken. Okay i understand that but what does that have to do with backing up the fact that they cant train the females? Those seem like two different things i dont see why they are related other than the fact that past generations have not attempted to teach the females..but that doesn't mean that they never should. I don't get why they wouldn't want to do everything they could to save ther own kind. How can a mother give birth to a child and then let them kill it off if its a baby girl. That is sick if you ask me. I don't know how they can sleep at night knowing they kill their own flesh and blood just because she is born a female. She isn't even given a chance to prove herself..just taken right out of the world as quickly as she came into it. It's not right and something really needs to be done. I have always wanted to adopt a child. I am not married yet im still a little young but once I am ready I will definitely keep China in mind. Those children deserve a better life. Thank you for sharing and thats really awesome that your friends adopted from China.

reply to John week 4

John,
I can relate to your mother and your grandmother in this story very well. I am not elderly but I am in a wheelchair because I cannot walk, so I experience this exact reaction from people quite often. Just because people see that someone is elderly or disabled, the stereotypical reaction is that we are not with it or capable of taking care of ourselves or communicating with others. Many times if I am with someone else, just like your grandmother and mother, people will flat out ignore me like I am not even there and start talking to my friend to find out about me. It is irritating because I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself, just like your grandmother. My friends usually get pissed off and are like " shes right in front of your face..why don't you ask her yourself?" Then they get all baffled and feel stupid..and im sorry but sometimes they should feel stupid because it is not right to treat people like that based on a stupid stereotype. We are all invidivuals and should not be clumped into some dumb assumption. Good for your mom and your grandmom for sticking up for themselves. Im glad you grandmother is healthy and well!

business post week 4

When I was reading chapter 8 in the book I was at the part where Julia T Woods was discussing pressures to comform to femininity with girls in school. I was also thinking about typical gender stuff like how girls wear pink and wear "girly" form fitting clothes typically, and baggy dark colored clothes are typically reserved for males. I work in a public school in Kensington (philly) and I was thinking about how the kids that I see at work every day do not really fit into the typical stereotypes of gender. Now I just want to put it out here right now that I am in no means insulting anyone or being judgemental, these are just observations I have noticed. The neighborhood is a very poverty stricken area, and it is also a"rough" place to live. I think that these aspects definitely reflect on these children and their personalities, because most of them definitely do not fit into the typical gender stereotypes. The females mostly wear big baggy pants and t shirts that are usually boys clothes. I know for a fact that this happens because they get hand me downs from older siblings or adults in the family. If you cannot afford to go out and buy all of your children clothes that are the right size for them, then you give them what you have available, even if it is too big or clothes meant for the opposite gender. The girls also do not usually act what you would consider to be "ladylike". They act tough and have mouthy attitudes and are loud and outspoken. If you even look at one of them the wrong way then forget it..you will definitely pay for it. Most say that "ladylike" females do not raise their voices or their hands to you. These girls will engage in a fist fight without even thinking twice about it. They will hit you, whether you are male or female, with no fear. If you ask me, this is learned behavior from their environment. "Children and adolescents generally do what is necessary to gain the approval and acceptance of their peers". (p. 199) There are a few exceptions of females that do wear girly type clothes and are less rough around the edges. Some have very pretty hair do's and are more dainty. They keep to themselves and will walk away from a fight instead of starting one. Since these girls do not fit in with most of the other girls they often get bullied, attacked, and harassed for being prisses and not being girls that can hold their on in the streets. I personally think that some of them are jealous of the pretty hair and nice clothes so they bully the girls because they can't match up to them. On page 198 Julia Woods says "girls often make fun of or bully girls who don't wear popular brands of clothing or who weigh more than what is considered idea". In this instance she is wrong because what actually happens is the total opposite of what she says. Girls that do wear popular clothing and are smaller and thinner are the ones who have hell to pay for it, because they are fewer and farther in between than the other girls. I think that she wrote the book based on her own experiences and what she has personally seen and learned, but she is not always accurate for every single person or location in the world. I think cultures and areas play a big role in how people's personalities and looks are formed as well. Where you are from or what is available to you also plays a big role as well. People are products of their own environments, so it is not safe to assume that all females and males act the same. We all grew up in different ways and in different types of locations. Everyone has their own different childhood and personal experiences, and this is a huge part in making us who we become.

reply to Dorit week 4

Dorit,I agree with you when you say that this is a gender issue because some people will think it might be good to explore this idea while others will probably find it innapropriate to suggest co ed roomates. I definitely agree with your statement about how although we dont have proven research i am more than sure that most male's parents would not have a problem with their son living with a female roomate, however a female's parents will probably feel that this would somehow lead to a violation of their girl's privcy and even somewhat of a loss of morals and values because many associate co ed with sexual promiscuity when that is not the case. In my opinion you are either promiscuous or you're not...what gender your roomate is, is not really going to change this either way. If you want to engage in sexual activity than you will go out and find someone if they are not right in front of you, and if you are not the type to be sexually promiscuous than just because there is a male in your room does not mean your automatically predetermined to have sex with him. I think many parents jump to conclusions when they need to just trust that their child is capable of making their own decisions. Same gendered roomates or co ed gendered roomates, it is not really likely going to change how someone acts. In many cases girls get along better with a good male friend because there is not competition in the same aspects as there can be with girls Girls can be petty and competitive with their girlfriends at times,and it often makes it hard for them to get along. I also feel that maybe having co ed roomates would give both sexes a chance to become more understanding and tolerant of one another, because once you are actually inside the situation instead of on the outskirts of it, it makes it easier to understand and relate to what is going on with people. I think this would give those that are mature enough to handle it a good life lesson for the real world. In the real world you do not have control over every single thing. You need to be able to compromise and get along and work well with others in order to be successful and this could really help some people. As long as everyone involved is comfortable and willing to try it out than I personally feel that there is nothing wrong with it, and it may even prove to be beneficial to our future society.

reply to Tom week 4

Tom,
I think i would probably react pretty similarly to some of your female friends, but it would be due to what experience I have had with guys and relationships in the past. From what I have seen in the past and from my guy friends and their relationships, it is pretty unusual for a guy to buy a girl something that nice so soon in the relationship. I guess it is somewhat stereotypical but I think i would have probably said the same thing to you..that its kind of a big deal to buy her that bracelet and she would probably think that you were really really into her and planned on sticking around for good while. If you bought it for her with no intention of a message of any kind or any meaning, just to be a nice guy and buy her a nice birthday gift, than that is very generous and kind of you and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that either because it is what YOU wanted to do and no one pushed you into it. I think the women also reacted the way they did because they didn't know your gf personally so they were likely being protective of you and did not want to see you being taken advantage of, especially because it is obvious that you are a nice guy. As far as the guy's reaction.. I think its pretty common for males to associate being nice with how much money did it cost. I dont really think alot of guys would spend alot of money on a gift for a girl unless they were pretty serious about them. Just like girls, guys do not want to be taken advantage of either and I think they would want to make sure a girl plans on being around and isn't a "gold digger" before they put themselves out and spend alot on her. This is just what I have seen, I am not saying that all guys think like this. So I am curious.. what was her reaction when you gave her the gift? Are you guys still together? And for what it's worth, like you said you did what you wanted too and gave it to her, and as long as you were comfortable with your decision than that is all that matters in the end.

reply to Linda week 3

Just on an opinion and no research to prove it, I am going to assume that yes it is more difficult for males to deal with this type of issue than for females. This does not mean that all mothers are very accepting and all fathers are not, but generally speaking I think more fathers would have trouble dealing with it. This is because many fathers were brought up in the day where we had stereotypical gender roles and boys were brought up to do "manly" things and girls were brought up to be feminine and dainty. For a father who wants to raise a son who grows up to be a tough manly man, than the words "my son is gay" would probably be the worst thing for them to have to hear and accept. This is because our soceity automatically labels homosexual males as feminine and unmanly, which is definitely not even true. There are many homosexual guys that are just as much a guys guy, or even more manly than a heterosexual male. And of course, there are many heterosexual males that are effeminate and could even exhibit more feminine characteristics than an actual homosexual male. These labels and assumptions that our society makes make it more difficult for everyone to come out and be themselves, and for loved ones to be accepting, because the bottom line is that everyone's worst fear comes down to them worrying about how will society accept them. Personally I don't think it is really an issue. If you love your child than it really does not matter what their sexual preference is. It has nothing to do with who they are as a person or what kind of character they have. I think if society as a whole would chill out than they would realize that if we love someone than we should be proud of who they are and accept them for it, whether we personally agree with it or not. As long as your child is happy and feels complete than we should respect them and only want whats best for their well-being.

business post week 3

Okay..so I don't know about the rest of you ladies but when I was reading chapter 12 in our book there were a couple of those side boxes with comments from a couple guys that seriously pissed me off. One of them was from a guy named Clarence who said " I don't believe that a man can rape his wife or girlfriend. Maybe it's rape if a guy wants sex, and a woman he doesn't know well doesn't, and he forces her. But a guy has a right to have sex in a relationship that is established. All this talk about date rape and marital rape is baloney. No woman I'm going with had better believe that baloney." (p. 290) This dude must be mistaken in his beliefs because he is full of shit. Just because you are in a relationship with someone or even married does not give you free reign to throw down your girlfriend or wife and have sex with them at your every whim without considering if she wants to have sex or not. If the female does not want to have sex with you than she has the right to say no. If you continue to do what you want without her consent then I don't care if she is your girlfriend or your wife, if she says no than that is rape. Just because you are in a relationship does not mean that it is her job to give you sex 24 hours a day. If you are in a relationship with a woman and you claim to love her than that means you respect her feelings and her wishes and if she does not feel like doing something than you need to respect her decision. This goes both ways too. A woman cannot claim that raping her husband or boyfriend is not possible either. It is a mutual decision between two people and they both need to consent to it. If one party is not willing and the other person does not stop than in my opinion that is rape.
The other comment that annoyed me was from Austin who said " What do girls expect if they go to a club where hookups happen, and they're wearing revealing clothes that are meant to excite and provoke guys, and they are dancing suggestively? It's like sending out an invitation to a guy. So why, when a guy accepts, do they blame him for responding to their invitation?" (p. 289) Guys automatically assume that girls are out to seek their attention. They never really see the other side of it, that maybe the girl felt like getting dressed sexy for herself and for no one else. Maybe she felt like dressing up and feeling pretty and going out and having a good time, and that the thought of picking up a guy never even crossed her mind. Many girls like to get dressed up and go out and dance, it is a fun thing for girls to do. Not all of them are there for males, many of them just go because they like to go out and have fun with their girlfriends. Even if a girl is dressed revealingly, that is her choice. Just because she may be showing skin does not make it an open invitation for some male to come over and start touching her. Guys assume that this means she is out to get some action, which is not always the case. Yes it may be in some cases, but definitely not all. It is called self control. and many males don't feel like they need to excercise this around females when they really do. A girl has the right and freedom to go out in public in whatever they choose to wear without having to be labeled as a girl that is asking for sexual attention. Males need to accept this and learn that it is not always just for their attention.
Now don't get me wrong because I am not some sexist male hating female at all, but I do think that these comments are both a little obnoxious. What do you think? And guys..whats your opinion on this? Do you agree with these guys's statements? If you do it's okay, I'm just curious on what others have to say about it.

reply to Celita week 3

Wow... I think it takes more than a second for all of that to really sink into someone's brain. You create the ever so needed controversy because you refuse to ever let anyone think or try to tell you that you are nothing less than equal as everyone else in this world..man or woman. I pity the fool that tries to mess with you or convince you that you are not worth everything that you know you are, because they will quickly be defeated by you no doubt. You will never let anyone take advantage of you or your confidence as a woman which is a beautiful awesome thing. Just by reading that I can definitely tell that you are one hell of an empowered woman and I think that is absolutely amazing. More women need to have confidence like you do, they could learn alot from you. Too many women do not stick up for themself and let others talk them down and into thinking that they are not good enough or cannot do something as well as a man could. This is nonsense because it is all about the inside of the person and their drive, not the physical characteristics of their body. I hope all of the females in this class get to read this post, and even the males as well. This is a good reminder for everyone as they go through daily life and socialize with others in their personal and professional lives.

reply to Jason week 3

Sorry I didn't see your post before or I would have answered sooner. So reading that made me smile because it is pretty awesome that you wrote about that and are proud of who you are. There is absolutely nothing wrong with being a "tough guy with a soft heart". I honestly believe that it makes you even more of a man to be able to show that you are in touch with your feminine side as well as your rough guy side. You are comfortable with who you are and have enough confidence to know that it does not matter if you enjoy chick flicks and watching Sex in the City. I think thats a very attractive quality in a guy..because in the end a girl is going to have more fun in your company because you are not afraid to be in touch with things she probably likes, and you care about more than just sports. Many guys want their girlfriends to watch sports with them which is totally fine, but then say the girl wants to watch a chick flick, then the guy should in turn watch the damn movie without bitching about it the entire way through. That is what happens in many cases and it really isn't too fair. More guys should learn a lesson from you..that you can still be a manly man and be in touch with your feminine side without worrying about what others will think of you, especially other guys. Stay true to who you are..I am sure that you will make a lucky lady very happy.

reply to Terry week 2

So when you first gave your daughter the options..did you purposely leave out dance because you honestly didn't think it is something she would go for? I was just curious. Were you happy that she chose dance because shes typically not into girly type stuff or did you really not care any more than you would if she chose karate? Yeah i agree with you that it is sad that adults, parents nonetheless, are making comments about how boys in tights are going to be laughed at once they get to school. What our world is in desperate need of is more open minded people..especially in this day and age it is time to be more accepting and open to others even if it is not something that we would do ourselves. If parents are teaching their children negative views than it just carries on through the children and creates more close minded people which we don't need. I say as long as no one is personally harming you than to each their own and people should just get over it and learn to be accepting of others.

business post week 2

I have a niece that just turned 1 year old last week. They had a birthday party for her and of course she received a ton of presents. Most of the gifts she got were plenty of girly stuff and girly colors such as pink and purple. Her mother(my sis in law) seems to think that she cant wear any color unless it is a color that is feminine. She has big blue eyes and I think she would look adorable in light blue. My sister in law refuses to buy her anything that is blue because she thinks it is for boys. There is a also a two year old boy, my nephew, and because he wears blue she thinks that her daughter shouldn't wear blue. They were saying that she needs clothes because she grew out of most of her stuff. When I went shopping for her I bought her a bunch of clothes and i picked out blue and green and even gray stuff. I knew my sis in law would be like uhhh because she wouldnt pick these colors out on her own but if someone gave them to her than its free clothes so she will end up using them eventually. I know it's mean but i am sick and tired of seeing my niece overdone in pink flowery stuff. She looks super cute in less feminine colors and doesn't look like a boy at all. I also got her this little baby handbag that has a brush and comb in it with a little mirror. I was at my brothers house after her party and her family was there too. My nephew who is two picked up the handbag that I got for her and was walking around with it and taking out the brush and doing his hair in the mirror. He is all into everyone's bags and he likes to carry them around..especially handbags. My sis in laws father saw him holding the baby girls handbag and he was like ahh what are you doing?? Thats a girl toy, put that down you don't play with that kind of stuff. He took the bag away from him and he then started crying. He told my brother you better watch out your son is holding a pocketbook that is pink..what is that about.? Then he told him stop crying you're a boy whats wrong with you... go play your football game and be a man. I was pretty annoyed by this whole scene. Who cares if he wants to hold a handbag..it's just a stupid bag...whats the big deal. They were like so shocked like oh my god the boy is holding a girls purse like god forbid that means he is not going to grow up manly. And then when he said something about boys not crying ..I said to him cry all you want boys can cry too whenever they are upset. If the baby girl cries no one ever tells her dont cry so no one should tell him not to cry just because he is a male. I personally have no problem with what colors either of them wear or if he wants to play with her toys then whatever, knock yourself out. Whenever I babysit him I never tell him that he cant play with her boys, nor do I push him into playing with "boy" stuff. I would rather my nephew grow up to be sensitive and caring then some big macho tough guy. I think it is for his benefit in the future and with his relationships with others to be sensitive. I do not think this makes him less manly, I think it even makes him a better man because if you ask me a real man is one who is not afraid to show his feelings and can show vulnerability when he needs to. To me that is more respected, and makes a person have real character.

reply to Charlene week 2

I agree. It isn't fair that a woman has to feel like she has to choose between her career and her kids. Women were made by god to be the ones to give birth to a child...it isn't like you can just decide that your husband will be the one. (in a typical case) Since this is the case, every place should be understanding and accomodating to a woman if she has a child and needs time off from a job to be with the child. Alot of places are very good about this but unfortunately not all are. At my brothers company they recently added something in the employee benefits which is that if you are a husband and your wife has a newborn than the company gives the man a paid 2 weeks off "maternity leave" so that he can be with his wife and then at home to help her and the new baby get adjusted. I thought this was really good because alot of times the male doesnt have this option and it is either that they can't take off from the job or if they do they won't be paid. With this option it allows the male to be of support to his family while not having to worry about financial issues.

mothers day-business post week 1

It does not matter what the physical sex is of the person, if they are taking care of a child and providing them with basic needs and nurturing them then they are "mothering" or caring for the child. There are many homes where children don't have mothers in their lives. The guardians or caretakers of these kids do the same things for them that a mother does, and they should be acknowledged for what they do as well. It should not matter if they are female or not female, or whether they are the child's biological mother or not. I work in a public school in Kensington and many of those kids do not have mothers in their lives. The Friday before Mother's Day weekend instead of only making mothers day cards for kids with mothers we made cards for every persons family whether there was a mother or not. Everyone should be recognized and thanked for caring for children.

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Hey I have never had a blog before so I don't really know what I'm doing. Hopefully I will get a clue pretty quick. Did I do this right?